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Eric Massa: Another straight man details his terrible locker room experience.....

Massa on Rahm Emanuel:
"He is an individual who would sell his mother to get a vote. He would strap his children to a front end of a steam locomotive," Massa said. Illustrating his point, he told the story of how he winded up in an argument with the chief of staff while they were both naked in the congressional gym showers.

"I'm sitting there showering, naked as a jaybird, and here comes Rahm Emanuel, not even with a towel wrapped around his tush, poking his finger in my chest, yelling at me because I wasn't gonna vote for the president's budget," Massa said. "Do you know how awkward it is to have a political argument with a naked man? ... It's ridiculous."



Thank you for the details Mr. Massa. Please go into more detail about congressional locker rooms! How 'bout pictures next time? wink wink

Another War!

First we had The War On Terror, The War On Drugs, The War On Mexicans, The War On Atheists now presents: The War On Naked Old Men In Locker Rooms!

Surfing the web, we discovered an unusual phenomena, a myriad of websites posting complaints of spoiled kids and various fitness snobs complaining about 'naked old men' in public dressing and locker rooms.

They even go so far as describing 'Their long wangs swinging your my face' . And my favorite 'I was looking directly into the butt-hole of a fat man bending over.' Some of these 'straight' guys should start a career writing gay porn stories. Their graphic descriptions certainly turned me on.

Men who are truly secure with their sexuality, real heterosexuals, do not notice other men who are dressing or undressing. Or watch all of there grooming habits in detail. Why? because they don't care. They aren't threatened by the sight of another naked man in a public change room. Sure, it's human nature to see what the other guys' got, many straight guys do this, no big deal.

But were talking straight up obsession! guys that walk into the locker rooms with pure dread, knowing they will have to look at the unusually large, low pendulous genitalia of a nude senior man just trying to get a shower. Funny how their eyes go straight to their private areas and buttocks.

Something strange happens when you have to change your clothes, or prepare to take a shower. You become naked. Have you ever seen a baby born with clothes on? Are there gyms and clothes stores in heaven?

We found this whining hilarious, and sad. In a society that worships youth, perfect bodies, perfect full hair, some even feel the lighter the skin you have, the more attractive you are. It's OK to be tanned, but not to have naturally dark skin. Hate for non-white people, hate for overweight people, hate for poor people. Why do they have to live on MY planet?

Message to these perfect young boys: Don't join the military. You have to shower with other men, some of them are not as perfect as yourself. And good luck whining about personal space in the military. Don't find yourself in jail. You have to shower with other men of other races, and many do not have perfect bodies like yours. Sometimes you only shower twice a week. Not to mention in prison, your true character shows. Snobs learn fast in jail. But you come from a wealthy family, you will never see the inside of a jail.

We understand your concern for everyone to be young, and have perfect gym toned bodies. Keep a full size mirror in your home. Look at yourself now. Check it again in 10 years. Check it again in 30 years.
When you hit 65, go to your gym, make sure you notice that snotty 20 year old changing into his work out clothes, rushing to get away from you because you're so old.

Soaping up after a workout

Here are some interesting links regarding mature men in locker rooms:
(Right Click, Open Link In New Tab/Window)

"What is with old men who casually walk around the gym locker room, all naked with their old white wooly sacks flopping around? 'White, wooly' you noticed all that?

Did you see your future?
(I was looking directly into the butt-hole of a fat man bending over)

Why do old men walk around naked?
I find this highly offensive, especially the fat and out of shape men, it's just gross.

What a tough life:
I see a naked old man once a day, usually about 4 or 5 days a week."

"Be glad you don’t have to go into the men’s locker room. In EVERY gym locker room I’ve been in there’s an 85 year old man walking around stark-ass naked. Mind you, he’s not heading toward the shower (or back from).

From the same page:
I’ve even seen an old badger prop his foot up on the bench like he was a rock climber. “Hey buddy, how was your workout?” “Fine, Old Timer; could you holster that thing?” Hot!

This one's good:
"So I was surprised and shocked to see a totally naked man standing in this area, neither drying his hair, or putting gel in it, or moisturising his face or hand.
He was in face applying the clearly marked "hand and face moisturiser" to his naked buttocks." lol, dude you caught all that?




Real nice guy:
Simply take care of your business and go on your way. Do everyone a favor and put some clothes on, you old bastard.

'No Towel Cult' invading the nations men's locker rooms:
http://media.www.alestlelive.com/media/storage/paper351/news/2003/03/06/Editorial/NoTowel.Cult.Lurks.In.Mens.Locker.Room-386920.shtml

Sir, Please put THAT Away

This kid really has issues:
'The 5 Locker Room Commandments'
Dont fart naked. 'I've heard some naked fat dude let one go in the middle of the locker room.' Do tell!

Hot:
"I’ll find a lumpy old dude at the sink next to me who’s decided that the proper way to brush his teeth, is to be completely naked with his flaccid anteater-like, pruned dork draped on the counter."

Stay classy:
This kid actually logs about all the ugly people at his gym.

Pure obsession:
"I am going to be assaulted by the hideous accidental glimpse of some old geezer's mutated shriveled balls."

In 20 years, you'll be 43. Maybe:
"That is no excuse for subjecting me (an innocent 23 year old just trying to stay in shape) to a daily barrage of gray, wrinkly love handles and saggy butts."

Please, go on...:
"It's like a rite of passage for an old guy to have a converation with another old guy through you and your two buddies in a locker room with ol' cock n' balls swinging completley non-chalantly."

Looking good after a shower

Now at least this kid is honest, poor thing:
(So it’s not fair that homos have all the fun! Why should they get to see naked men in locker rooms when I can’t see naked women?)

Wow, just wow.
If you're in the same locker room with this kid, he has some rules for you.

Another snob has a set of rules for ugly men in his locker room

Heres a guide on 'showering etiquette' and how to wear the right bathing suits. And this guy is straight!

Ship shape, clean and strong

Odds and ends:

http://digg.com/health/Gym_Etiquette_Do_You_Make_These_Mistakes_2?t=13905040

http://au.answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080509220659AAbP0Km

http://forums.scout.com/mb.aspx?s=174&f=2582&t=2714810

http://bleacherreport.com/articles/38453-to-the-nudist-in-the-locker-room

http://www.diet-blog.com/archives/2005/05/07/gym_locker_rooms_men_flaunt_women_hide.php

http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/chat-conversation/how-come-only-guys-walking-around-naked-locker-room-603613.html

http://www.letsrun.com/forum/flat_read.php?thread=294839

http://underscorebleach.net/jotsheet/2004/11/old-men-in-the-locker-room

http://www.yelp.com/topic/los-angeles-if-youre-a-guy-whos-been-in-a-locker-room-please-answer-me

http://www.tigerdroppings.com/rant/messagetopic.asp?p=8170217

http://www.insaneabode.com/Articles/oldmen.html

http://www.elitefitness.com/forum/chat-conversation/old-naked-men-gym-225980.html

http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index?qid=20080618214357AA64k2x

http://media.www.studlife.com/media/storage/paper337/news/2008/03/31/Soapbox/More-Naked.Old.Guy.In.The.Locker.Room.Please-3292459.shtml

Great commercial from youTube:
Honda Pilot Nudist Commercial

Mens shower hall

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